First of all, i flunked my IPPT again and there goes my first year's IPPT. ZZ. Fuck it, fuck it. 2.4 again. Yeah, i did gave up half way through because when i looked into my stopwatch, it's already 9 minutes plus and i have only got 30 seconds left for half more lap. I was shag out. Givin up is not a choice but i made this choice because I don't think I can make it in time. Master Parade this mornin after IPPT. Its a parade for those who got marksmanship and IPPT Gold personnel. Marksmanship is for my sergeants while IPPT Gold tags are for us. If I could make it in time, i could have went up to the front and receive the tag from my OC and sew it on my No.4. The feelin is damn down upon seein those Golds goin up to take it. Before the run, my platoon mates and my sergeants are stressin me and lookin forward to see me gettin Gold. After the run, everyone's fuckin me. Fuck you la yen kiat! Where's your Gold? Didnt get to earn another Gold for the company, i think i need to train more on my speed trainin.

24 points and i cant get Gold. I'm really disappointed in myself. I just want the IPPT Gold tag on my sleeves. I should have just run with my life. Although everyone's sayin that it's easy to hit 9.44 mins, but it may not be easy for me.

This month will be a hectic month for me as i will be burnin my weekends due to live firin and guard dutys which suay-ly fall on saturdays. Which means i will only be able to book out on Sunday mornin and book in at night again. ZZ. What a month.

我已经力不从心.